Had a rough day don’t know why it’s getting to me today. Guess just my time to have a bad day I guess.
I’ve had good people in my life and I’ve some really shitty ones too. I know I’m not a perfect person, never said I was. I do try to be nice to everyone and sometimes that really bites the behind. Sometimes the more I try the harder it is to keep myself myself, and not get lost in the stuff you’re doing for everyone else, and a lot of times with little or no appreciation.
I don’t want to become that bitter old person with nothing good to do or say for anyone. I truly love my kids and my grandbabies with all my heart and sometime they’re the ones who treat you the worst.
I guess the saying stands for good reason ”Youre gonna miss me when I’m gone” I hope that does happen for a long time but I don’t want to be stressed when I come to visit. I’m always thinking I’m doing something wrong. Why is that?
Why do we think we are always to blame? Thought I got passed this but maybe in reality I didn’t.
I guess I still have quite a bit of growing and healing to do. This process can take a lifetime to get through and get on the healed side of things.
They’re are people I miss immensely and some I could have done without, but I know I had to meet all of this people for some reason or another. I guess the people we don’t want in our lives require us to grow more than the ones we do want here.
We do what is necessary to carry on and that’s just what I’m gonna do, I have to I am a survivor.